i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
he puts the penis in happiness.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
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