You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I smell like Dick and happiness
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
