Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
please come you make the beer taste better
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
40s are totally the cure
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
