I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize
