whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
