Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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