Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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