Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize