I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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