that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize