i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
