Me. At least after what I've been through.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
