she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
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