I hate all girls vehemently.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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