Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
