I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
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