This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
