I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.