Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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