I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
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