so explain again why im purple
no
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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