I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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