Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
