You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
