Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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