If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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