i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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