I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize