Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
