So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
