I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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