i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
i dont even know how to be here
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
