I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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