ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
