This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
