Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
