I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
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