Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
