capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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