Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
