as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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