Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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