Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
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