I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
