your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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