my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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