I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
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drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
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On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I'm getting married
To pizza
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize