it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize