Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'

  (586): View more from Michigan

  I thought that was really considerate

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  (586): I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating' (586): I thought that was really considerate http://tfl.nu/g1h7
  Replies (3) Good night (2423) Bad night (653)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.

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  (585): I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town. http://tfl.nu/h13y
  Replies (1) Good night (1027) Bad night (500)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.

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  (954): My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet. http://tfl.nu/5qcs
  Replies (48) Good night (1036) Bad night (2803)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  (917) i just came from walking.

  (309): View more from Illinois

  haha you just came from walking?

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  (309): (917) i just came from walking. (309) haha you just came from walking? http://tfl.nu/6hd4
  Replies (53) Good night (5887) Bad night (864)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  USA! USA! USA!

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  (262): i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic (414): USA! USA! USA! http://tfl.nu/meud
  Replies (34) Good night (4745) Bad night (843)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..

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  (315): Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka.. http://tfl.nu/lv2f
  Replies (20) Good night (4486) Bad night (997)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.

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  (203): I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore. http://tfl.nu/i7wi
  Replies (19) Good night (3769) Bad night (1067)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.

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  (801): He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick. http://tfl.nu/gyi3
  Replies (38) Good night (1022) Bad night (4563)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.

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  (843): I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier. http://tfl.nu/n87w
  Replies (5) Good night (3585) Bad night (873)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?

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  (225): Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday? http://tfl.nu/4464
  Replies (5) Good night (2416) Bad night (766)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series

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  (402): Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series http://tfl.nu/c4pq
  Replies (13) Good night (3126) Bad night (982)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick

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  (484): Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick http://tfl.nu/a0s8
  Replies (6) Good night (756) Bad night (2087)
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2

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  (902): Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2 http://tfl.nu/oegq
  Replies (5) Good night (728) Bad night (749)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl

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  (607): U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl http://tfl.nu/xeyc
  Replies (9) Good night (340) Bad night (1460)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?

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  (802): Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in? http://tfl.nu/o63r
  Replies (8) Good night (308) Bad night (1218)

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