I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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