Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize